There was this mad wee sheep n it decided tae break oot fae its pen n see whit’s whit. Oot it went fae the field and headed fir the big lights a Muirhead! Wow.
“Here, ye looking fir business?” said a can a Diet Coke by a lampost.
“Aye, business. Al show ye a good time.”
“Naw am orite. It’s ma first time oot, so I hink-”
“Fucking hink yir too good fir me, eh?” the can said, hopping towards the wee sheep. A stinking yella liquid leaked oot that wee hole were ye open it and drink fae. Turned oot some bastard had drank awe the coke and filled it up wae pish.
“Am gonnae slash you.”
The sheep shat it big style. Didnae know whit tae dae. It started running but the can was too fast and caught it nae bother. Slashed the poor wee hing’s face tae bits.
The sheep went home soaking wae blood. Lesson learned but. The wee sheep never left its pen again.